Why My Life Is Like a Sitcom

Because it's all about reality these days and there is nothing more "real" than my life. In fact I'd call it: Real messy, real empty of nutritious food, real full of my children, all of which are angry at me tonight, at this hour, for many reasons but not limited to: 1) boyfriend issues (out with the old in with the new and the sub issues that revolve around this multi faceted crisis which in effect has led to mood swings, lipping off and other general, shall we say, unhappiness to all parties involved and the occasional hysterics(mine mostly) related to attempts at parental advice, motherly concern and lastly, the ultimate in "I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO OR SAY SO I'LL JUST TROT OUT THIS - threats. 2)bedtime issues (not related to the above but to the lingering rugrats who attempt to listen in on the above conversations aka shouting matches 3)towel issues (on the floor, under the bed, behind the doors and none in the bathroom) 4)Christmas shopping issues, such as, when, where, how, and what 5)bill issues, such as,, "Where in the HELL did I lay that phone bill?" and "Where in the hell IS the phone?". 6)marital issues such as, "Why always, football, western or space invader movies?" 7)psychological issues such as, should I send my rat terrier Petie into counseling because he will lapse with ease into a pissing frenzy, at will? Petie! did you pee on the carpet? 8)experi-MENTAL issues like, what IS that in the fridge? 9)no dining room table issues so we eat on a cardboard table that lookes like a checkerboard and occasional I find cherrios scattered across it's top in a serious checker duet. and finally the last reason my life is like a sitcom 10)it makes no sense whatsoever