Glasses my Asses!!

Hell...it's come to this now...glasses. JUST FOR READING THOUGH...and computing and etc. What next...a leaky bladder? a pendulous abdomen...ooops...too late...already have that. Nothing like two big shiney pieces of glass surrounding your nose to call attention to it. And who doesn't enjoy that? That is exactly what I need. I only wish that my glasses had a big red flashing sign on the bridge that said, Look over here at this gargantuan schnoz! Check it out! It's so big it should have it's own zip code...