May 01, 2008

Wedgie My ASS I Call the Coppers

News - Local News

Police respond to call of felony wedgification
by The Prowler - 4/30/2008

At 8:16 p.m. on April 22, a North Platte police patrolman was dispatched by the 911 Center to a North Platte home in the 200 block of William Avenue on the complaint of a wedgie.

Seems a neighbor kid gave a youngster a wedgie and the boy’s father called the police.

A wedgie is the condition of having one’s underwear or other garmets “wedged” between the buttocks. This can occur, due to tight garments or physical activity, or performed as a prank by another person by yanking the undergarments upward, thus “giving a wedgie.”

The officer arrived at the residence and talked with all concerned, according to a police spokesman. The father of the boy who received the wedgie thought it was inappropriate.

The officer was able to calm the situation and no one was cited or arrested.

The police spokesman said they are ever vigilant and on the lookout for wedgies here.

“You might get away with that in Lincoln or Omaha,” the spokesman said. “But we’re not going to allow wedgies in North Platte.”

The spokesman said they planned to put a stop to the wedgies before they escalate into full-blown melvins or atomic wedgies.


Annette said...

What? I should subscribe to the North Platte paper. This is great news.

Thomas Wright said...

Huh. I found this article by searching "wedgies yak" in google (don't ask why) and was pleasantly surprised at what I found.
Looks like I'm gonna have to move to North Platte if I want to keep my family safe from rogue wedgie practitioners.
Thanks for the heads up,