Like my nails?
I don't. I pasted them on last night and I'm a cripple.
[caption id="attachment_1574" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="Fingernail Hell"][/caption]
But hey...my hair looks almost as bad.
I may just open my own freak show and charge a quarter a peep. Maybe I'll get my own freak trailer and travel in freak style from one county carnival to another. I'll eat caramel corn and hot dogs and dirty pretzels. I'll keep a herd of dusty stuffed animals and a goldfish bowl beside my rattly bed. I'll dye my hair red and let my teeth turn brown from bad coffee and too much time between brushings. Maybe I'll get a poster of my own with my freakish self on it and it will be plastered around towns, on telephone poles and in supermarkets. People might come from miles and miles away to see the freak show. But you people...you got it made. I just gave you a free ticket...on the house.